The Other Side of the Table

Since having kids, I have always been interested and slightly worried (ok, very worried) about life on the other side of the table. I am used to being the teacher, now I have to be the parent. I find it is sometimes a hard balance. When I had my first child I was under the delusion that I had years before I would have to be the "parent" at school. I should have listened more closely when people said that the years go fast. Just like that my oldest is in preschool and we have our first round of Parent-Teacher Conferences next week!

Sometimes being a teacher makes having a conversation about my own kids easier. I get it, I live it everyday. Other times, it makes it harder. It's too easy to put myself in their situation and feel frustrated because they did not handle it the way I think they should (read: the "right" way.) My youngest has a milk protein sensitivity. I had no idea what that even meant or that it even existed until she was 5 weeks old. I had heard of being lactose intolerant, but I had never heard of a milk protein sensitivity. Thanks to Dr. Google, I quickly learned what it was and treatment options. In my daughter's case, it is simple. She eats dairy and she gets a rash on her face and has a stomach ache. The treatment is easy too. Don't eat dairy. Easy is relative though. The concept of not eating dairy is easy, the difficulty comes in when I look at food labels and realize that dairy is in a lot. It is in things that seem random (Kroger graham cracker sticks, but not in Kroger graham crackers) and not in things that I think would be logical (it took me 8 months to figure out Oreo Cookies do not contain milk. That was a great day!)

Kiddo 2 started a new daycare around the time she was eating mostly table food. This made her milk protein issue more challenging because she was eating more food. When we were signing her up for daycare, it was always the main point of emphasis. We wanted them to fully understand that she can have NO dairy. This means someone has to read EVERY food label. Her daycare assured us it would not be a problem.

I had a feeling from day one that they did not fully understand the fact that no dairy means no dairy. It does not mean no milk, ranch or cheese. It means no product that is made with milk or milk protein. Kiddo 2 did not seem to have a reaction and because I did not have any evidence (and I hate confrontation), I did not push the issue.  I hate confrontation and I don't want to accuse anyone of not doing their job. A few weeks ago Kiddo 2 managed to grab a few cheese crackers and a few days before that she snuck some cheese pizza. I was notified both times and didn't want to make anyone feel bad, so I did not make a big deal about it. Again, I am a teacher, I know mistakes happen and I know attention gets divided when kids are involved. After the pizza and cheese cracker incidents, Kiddo 2 developed a rash and it has stuck around for weeks. Which was my first piece of evidence that they were giving her food she should not be eating. After a few days of contemplation, I finally built up the nerve to talk to the director who assured me she did not think Kiddo 2 was getting anything with dairy. In my opinion, there are so many things wrong with the statement "I don't think" when it comes to dealing with allergies. I realize my daughter has a mild reaction in comparison to people who have life threatening allergies, but there is no "I think" allowed. Either she is getting food with milk or she is not getting food with milk.  There is no grey area.

This morning I was given my second piece of evidence when I saw  a teacher give her a breakfast bar. I know from experience that most breakfast bars and granola bars contain milk. I can only eat certain brands now and those are usually the expensive organic ones, which I was pretty sure the daycare was not buying. The teacher was extremely apologetic and made it seem like a simple error or not checking the label. I don't want to make anyone feel bad or point out mistakes, but my child cannot continue to be given food that gives her a stomach ache. I wrote about this experience in a short Facebook post and was given some great advice. Thank you Anne and Tori! Now I get to go from parent to teacher mode. I get to teach. I get to education her daycare about milk protein sensitivity and I get to be an advocate for my child. 

It is not easy. These are hard conversations. Being the parent has given me a view from the other side of the table and I see that both sides struggle with similar challenges. I still believe we both want the same thing. We both want the best for our kids and our students. We both want our kids to be successful. My journey to being the parent is just beginning. I have been the teacher for nine years, but this is my first year as a parent. It is a learning process and I know I will make mistakes. The focus needs to stay on our kids.

I want to believe the best of people. I want to believe that they are doing their best at their job and taking care of things. Sometimes it is hard to give this trust, but I find it is easier to believe good things are people. 

Lessons Learned: 
1. Reflect and calm down.
2. Talk it through with other people.
3. Do not let anger get in the way.
4. Do not point blame.
5. Focus on solving the problem.

*Update
My guy instincts were correct and I was presented with a list of thirteen items that my daughter has been getting on a routine basis that contain milk. I was given reasons why food was not checked earlier: they were understaffed and did not have a full time cook and although I don't think either of those reasons are a good excuse, I have tried to take this opportunity to educate others on dairy allergies. 

Failures in Blogging

I have spent a lot of time over the past few weeks freshening up my blog and switching back to Blogger from Weebly (post about that transition to come soon.) As I was setting up my Blogger account I was reading some of my old blog posts. My Blog is a constant reminder of my failures. As a perfectionist, this bothers me.  I have often thought about deleting many posts or deleting the blog all together and starting over. What would that mean though? What would it symbolize.

Over the past six years, I have tried many things: blog challenge, fitness challenges and reading challenges to name a few. I tend to expect too much from myself and my schedule and I end up short on many these challenges. The lessons I have learned from these challenges come from trying and not from always being successful. 

It is hard to be reminded of my failures. Pushing the delete button gets rid of the physical evidence of the failure, but the failure is still there and pretending that I am perfect is not being honest to myself. I have written many lame posts and I have tried to do too much with too little time. It is a process.  It is learning. Seeing many old posts reminds me about where I started and how far I have come.

I think this is why I am so insecure about people I know following me on Twitter or reading my Blog. I worry about saying something stupid and people I actually know seeing it. It is different when a random person sees it, but it becomes personal when it is someone I know. I prefer to live my life in isolation, not open to criticism or opinions. I need to step outside my comfort zone on this one. The first step was simply starting. Now I need to actively share. Master one thing and move on to the next.

What challenges you to step outside your comfort zone?

Professional Google Account

I am currently in my ninth year of teaching and I have taught in 6 different districts (I currently work in two districts and I have relocated states three times.) I love Google tools and I have found them to be very useful during my career. It allows me to work without always having a stable home computer. I have also learned the hard way how time consuming it can be to change documents from one account to another. This is especially true when I have left a district and my account is deleted, so I am on a short time table to get things organized while also dealing with all the normal end of the year tasks.

I have made this mistake twice and I vowed I would never do it again.  This summer I encountered a different problem: my personal Google account was maxed to capacity. This year I found myself once again using my school Google account to organize my files because I did not have room in my personal account. As I brainstormed ways to fix this (I also have the issue of working in a school that is not a Google School this year, which presents is a new challenge), I came up with the idea of creating a new Professional Google account solely to organize my professional documents: pictures, videos, lesson plans and documents.

I was all set to create a new Google Account when I remembered that I still have my old Google Account that is under my maiden name.  I decided to use that account instead of creating a new one.  This account is going to be used solely for professional documents.  This way I do not need to worry about taking up space in my personal account for professional files. Also, I won't have to worry about transferring my files to another account if I were to leave my current school.

Eventually I want to have my blog, YouTube and all teaching files under the same account. It is going to take some time to make that all happen, but I think it will be very helpful to know where all of my teaching files and resources are located. 

How do you keep your files organized?